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another sleepless night

Counting sheepmy body is so tired it feels like it doesn’t exist anymore. when i lie down it doesn’t matter what position i settle myself in. i feel like i am floating about my bedroom, i’m just thought. the thoughts don’t stop, but the body is calm. i cannot feel any of it nor can i feel my own breathing, so it feels like i do not have a body.

sitting at my desk i am aware of structures in the room that do not exist. i feel the presence of a wall and fireplace right behind me, that aren’t here. my peripheral vision sees them, but when i turn around they are not there.

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